Dungeons and Dragons Classes Are in Session
Ruby: “So why’d you help me out back there? In the courtyard?”
RWBY “The Shining Beacon” (Volume 1, Episode 2)
Jaune: “Eh, why not? My mom always says, ‘Strangers are just friends you haven’t met yet.”
All heroes are not created equal. Some are stronger and more durable, others are faster and wiser. It can be difficult to tell what characters you’re writing can do compared to others. Uber-nerd Gary Gygax created a method to define characters for his role playing game: the class system.
Dungeons and Dragons classes transform characters into recognizable archetypes. Ten were built up from the three archetypes of Fighter, Wizard, and Rogue. It sounds strange, but your favorite movie characters easily embody the system. So what are the Dungeons and Dragons classes? What are some of the many ways subclasses can change them? Grab a character sheet and a pencil. Let’s find out.
Scene Select
Artificer
Characters: Scotty from Star Trek, The Ghostbusters, Q from James Bond
[Vision has been hacked]
Visionquest “Malware” (Season 1, Episode 4)
EDITH: [grabs a Programmer’s Bible] “I break thee from thy loop with batch command end function. I sever thine process with\body in all targeted nodes, in the name of function and command–“
Ultron: “THE POWER OF CODE COMPELS YOU!“
EDITH: “-database and query, Control+Alt+Delete thee from this place!!!“
Artificers forge their own magic by creating enchanted items. They often lean into technology with powered armor, robots, guns, and anything else that weaponizes Clarke’s Third Law. Others might go the Geppetto route and create living items.
Artificers can branch out at level 3. Alchemists are your Severus Snape types who brew victory. Artillerists like Jinx make really big magic guns. Battle Smiths fight alongside their robotic creations while Armorers wear magical suits that Tony Stark wouldn’t mock… too much.
If you choose this Dungeons and Dragons class, remember that any sufficiently analyzed magic is indistinguishable from SCIENCE!
Barbarian
Characters: Wolverine, Worf, Conan of Cimmeria
Alex Mercer: “NOTHING WILL PROTECT YOU FROM ME! NOT MEN! NOT WEAPONS! NOT ARMOR!!!“
Prototype
Barbarians are the big guys. Often crass and loud, there’s no one else you’d want at your back in a fight. They wield oversized weapons, chuck smaller foes like footballs, and can grow stronger by entering a Rage.
Barbarians choose Primal Paths at level 3. Berserkers are exactly what you think, Hulks running amok in all-consuming frenzies. Perhaps you are a Storm Herald, embodying Mother Nature’s fury like Thor? Does the Path of the Zealot fuel your fury as it does for Gorr: the God-Butcher?
Barbarians have many ways to use their Rage instead of letting it rule them.
Dungeons and Dragons Class: Bard
Characters: Lorne from Angel, Willy Wonka, The Music Meister
Tom: “Old Tom Bombadil is a merry fellow,
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
Bright blue his jacket is, and his boots are yellow
None has ever caught him yet, for Tom, he is the Master:
His songs are the stronger songs, and his feet are faster.”
Bards are the flashiest mages. Magic infuses their songs as they dazzle with lighter weapons. These jacks of all trades can heal and harm, but specialize in persuasion, intimidation, and deception. Bards live rock star lives, so watch your daughters. And sons. Dragons. Maybe any attractive sheep as well…
Come one, come all and learn a Bardic subclass at level 3! The College of Swords welcomes anyone honing the blade, be they a clown or The Joker. The College of Eloquence Bards can argue lyrically like they escaped from Hamilton. Perhaps you’ll join The Doctor in the College of Lore to seek truth and beauty from the universe?
The stage is yours, my fellow Bards! Break a leg.
Cleric
Characters: Shepard Book, Friar Tuck, Daredevil
Melinoë: “It’s good to see you, Artemis, but I must be off. Time’s against us and all that.”
Hades II
Artemis: “Time’s an old fool too busy besieging the Mountain of the Gods to sense the threat coming his way. Go get him.”
Clerics are healers who double as divine artillery. Their faith grants holy magic related to their god’s domain and the ability to terrify undead. They can also beseech their god for divine intervention. Clerics are surprisingly strong without magic, able to wear heavy armor and bash someone’s head in with a mace. As any player will tell you: Don’t. Piss off. The healer.
Clerics choose their subclass at level 1 based on their faith. Will you join the Arcana Domain and seek magic through faith? Use the Twilight Domain to protect night travellers like Moon Knight? Or perhaps you minister to the dead and end undeath with the Grave Domain?
Whatever your religion, you’ve got a friend in very high places with this Dungeons and Dragons class.
Druid
Characters: Poison Ivy, Radagast the Brown
Storm: “Flames of the Sun, source of all creation. I summon a tempest of fire and light whose flares ignite the spark of hope in darkness, and blaze our trail to end Apocalypse, FOR WE ARE THE DAWN THAT BREAKS HIS NIGHT!”
X-Men ‘97 “Days of Past Future” (Season 2, Episode 1)
Druids harness the magic of nature against anything that disrupts the world’s balance. They can command plants, elements, and Wildshape into animals. There’s little worse than attacking a mage only to have them hulk out into a T. Rex.
Druidic Circles reveal their secrets at level 2. Circle of the Land Druids are like Captain Planet, drawing magic from many biomes. Circle of the Moon Druids can shapeshift more often and into stronger forms. Join the Circle of Wildfire if you, like Galactus, understand that creation can only come after destruction.
It’s difficult to screw up in this Dungeons and Dragons class. Just do what comes naturally.
Dungeons and Dragons Class: Fighter
Characters: d’Artagnan, Gimli, Wonder Woman
Inigo Montoya: “You are using Bonetti’s Defense against me, eh?
The Princess Bride
Dread Pirate Roberts: “I thought it fitting considering the rocky terrain.”
Inigo: “Naturally. You must expect me to attack with Capo Fero?”
Roberts: “Naturally. But I find Thibullet cancels out Capo Fero, don’t you?”
Inigo: “Unless the enemy has studied his Agrippa. Which I have.”
Fighters are masters of combat and don’t discriminate. You’ll find samurai, gunslingers, and shield-bearers fighting shoulder to shoulder. Fighters aren’t as flashy as other Dungeons and Dragons classes, but they can attack several times per turn and are damned hard to kill.
Fighters find their specialty at level 3. Champions like John Wick eschew tricks to be really good at killing and really bad at dying. Perhaps an Eldritch Knight such as Geralt of Rivera is more to your liking, mixing magic with swordplay? Break out the trick arrows if you wish to be an Arcane Archer like Green Arrow.
Ask one question before choosing this Dungeons and Dragons class: where do you find your strength?
Monk
Characters: Mr. Miyagi, Shang-Chi, Goku
Master Yoda: “A Jedi uses The Force for knowledge and defense, never attack.”
Star Wars Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back
Monks are masters of martial arts. They draw on their body’s Ki to empower their strikes with magic, granting themselves superhuman strength and speed. Monks don’t have to fight bare-handed, often wielding quarterstaffs and light swords to strike down foes.
A Monk’s cultivation proceeds through several Ways at level 3. The Way of the Drunken Master outmaneuvers enemies while dead drunk. The Way of the Four Elements uses Ki to conjure elemental attacks faster than you can say “Avatar: the Last Airbender.” Perhaps you are a Warrior of the Shadows, defeating your foes with ninja techniques like Batman?
Your journey to mastery of this Dungeons and Dragons class has begun, grasshoppa.
Paladin
Characters: Optimus Prime, Luke Skywalker, Artoria Pendragon
Adora: “Etheria needs us, and I won’t let him hurt anyone else.”
She-Ra and the Princesses of Power “Taking Control” (Season 5, Episode 6)
Catra: “Where are you going?”
Adora: “To send Horde Prime a message. [raises her sword] For the Honor of Grayskull!”
Paladins are archetypal knights in shining armor. They swear a Sacred Oath that empowers them with magic provided they follow the Oath’s tenants. Breaking it destroys their magic until they atone. All paladins can heal their allies with Lay on Hands.
Sacred Oaths are sworn at level 3. Will you follow the Round Table’s ideals by swearing the Oath of Devotion? Swear the Oath of Redemption as you check into the Hazbin Hotel? Does an Oath of Vengeance guide your wrath like The Spectre? Or did you abandon your faith and become an Oathbreaker?
These and other Oaths lay before you, squire. Remember that with a great Dungeons and Dragons class, there must also come great responsibility.
Dungeons and Dragons Class: Ranger
Characters: The Man With No Name, Blade, Katniss Everdeen
Trevor: “Oi, Death! I want a word with you.“
Castlevania “The Endings” (Season 4, Episode 9)
Death: “You know me?“
Trevor: “I’m Trevor Belmont, of House Belmont. Of course I know you. Finding things and recognizing things is what we do. And you are absolutely a thing.“
Rangers are hunters. They mix nature magic with swordplay and archery. Their specialty is tracking down and defeating specific enemy types wherever they hide. Rangers often have an animal companion fighting by their side, such as a raven or a trio of bears.
Three is the magic number for a Ranger’s specialties. Monster Slayers like Buffy the Vampire Slayer take aim at anything preying on the innocent. You may become a Fey Wanderer like Aragorn, ally to mortals and immortals. Or perhaps you’re a Gloom Stalker, a Punisher-esque slayer of the wicked?
If you choose this Dungeons and Dragons class, there are many ways to become a powerful Ranger.
Rouge
Characters: Captain Jack Sparrow, Catwoman, Ghostface
Lupin: “So much the better if no one can ever say, with absolute certainty “There is Arsene Lupin!” The essential point is that the public may be able to point to my work and say, without fear of being wrong “Arsene Lupin did that!“
The Escape of Arsene Lupin
Rogues are the stealth experts. If you need an area scoped out or a treasure chest unlocked, they’re the ones to turn to. Rogues strike from the shadows with flashing daggers and nocked arrows, assassinating foes before they know they’re in danger. Just keep an eye on your purse.
You guessed it, level 3 is when a Rogue picks their subclass. Will you be a feared Assassin like Black Widow? Manipulate friends and foes as a Moriarty-esque Mastermind? Or do you want more money than The Kingpin and become a Thief?
With this Dungeons and Dragons class, wealth and power lie before you. All you need to do is take it.
Sorcerer
Characters: Damien Thorne, Alucard, Loki
Omni-Man: “Look what [humans] need to mimic a fraction of our power. It’s right to pity them, Mark. Wrong to value them over your own kind!”
Invincible “Where I Really Come From” (Season 1, Episode 8)
Sorcerers are the X-Men of spellcasters. They’re born with magic from an inhuman progenitor or develop it in bizarre circumstances. A sorcerer’s innate powers inspire fear and hatred. They are often hunted by bigots. They can use Sorcery Points to fuel Metamagic, altering their spells in many ways.
Sorcerer’s subclasses are tied to their backstory and unlocked at level 1. Perhaps you are the child of a dragon like Smaug, born with resistance to their element and flight? Do you have an Aberrant Mind, granted nightmarish powers by enduring Cthulhu? Or are you a Divine Soul Sorcerer only a few steps below demigods like Heracles? As Maury Povich would ask, who is the parent?
Dungeons and Dragons Class: Warlock
Characters: Dr. Faciller, Jinu, Zen-Aku
Riri: “Okay. If it ain’t Dormammu, then what?”
Ironheart “The Past is the Past” (Season 1, Episode 6)
The Hood’s Patron: “Ah, sorry. Should’ve introduced myself. Well… I go by a lot of names, some of them are quite cruel and hurtful to me. But I like you, Riri, so you can call me… Mephisto.”
Warlocks are the desperate magic casters. They make deals with powerful Patrons for their spells, sometimes of their own volition, others from sheer desperation. The Warlock Patron can be kindly or evil, but they own the Warlock completely and you do not want to breach your contract. Warlocks can only cast two spells at a time, but they always cast them at full power and recover their magic with minimal rest.
Patrons are chosen at creation and unlock more powers at higher levels. Will you sell your soul to Mephisto for The Dark One’s Blessing? Agree to serve a Noble Genie in hopes that your wish will be granted? Perhaps you chose to wield a magic weapon in exchange for a Hexblade’s curse?
If you want more knowledge about this Dungeons and Dragons class, I could help… for a price. Do we have a deal?
Wizard
Characters: John Constantine, Hermione Granger, Orko
Rita Repulsa: “Magic wand, make my Goldar GROW!“
Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers “Day of the Dumpster” (Season 1, Episode 1)
Wizards earned their magic the hard way. No gizmos, powerhouse parents, or devil deals, they studied and learned every spell they have. That gives Wizards far more options for spells and the ability to cast more often than their contemporaries, but doesn’t leave much time for hitting the gym.
Wizards choose their courses at level 2. Evocation Wizards like Emperor Palpatine harness the elements for their attacks. Perhaps you prefer Abjuration like Doctor Strange and protect your allies with wards. Necromancers like Sauron know how to recycle their enemies. But there are many more schools of magic, so we await you here at your magical academia.
What Dungeons and Dragons Class would you pick if given a chance? Did we gloss over your favorite subclass? Tell us in the comments.
Jared Bounacos has written for Movie Rewind since 2016.
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