Joker’s Wild: The Joker’s 10 Craziest Crimes

Spoilers for Batman: The Killing Joke, Suicide Squad, Batman Arkham City, Injustice: Gods Among Us, Batman (1989), A Death in The Family, Batman v. Superman

Joker: “Uh-uh-uh, don’t touch that remote! I know it’s heartbreaking to have your favorite shows pre-empted. But look what you’re getting instead: me! And a whole truckload of mindless violence and wanton property damage! Everything that makes TV great! So stay tuned, you won’t believe your eyes…”

-The Joker, Justice League

Anyone who knows anything about Batman knows The Joker. He’s killed scores of people, crippled Batgirl (voiced in Batman: The Killing Joke by Tara Strong) and even killed Jason Todd, the second Robin (voiced by Jensen Ackles in Batman: Under The Red Hood). Since Joker is going to be a major character in Suicide Squad and Batman: The Killing Joke, let’s take a look at some of his crazier schemes.

#10 – Christmas With The Joker
Batman: The Animated Series

Joker: “Crashing through the roof, in a one-horse open tree, busting out I go, laughing all the wheeeeeee! Ha ha ha ha!”

Batman: Christmas with The Joker

Joker opens this episode singing the famous “Jingle Bells, Batman Smells” song before escaping Arkham in a rocket-powered Christmas tree. Hang on, boys and girls, it’s only gonna get crazier from here.

Joker kidnaps Commissioner Gordon (Bob Hastings voiced him here, and Ben Mckenzie plays him in TV’s Gotham) and Harvey Bullock (Donel Logue, also from Gotham) and lures Batman through several Christmas-themed traps. He even convinces Batman to open a present that hits him in the face with a pie.

#9 – The Laughing Bat
The Batman

Batman: “The costume party is over, Joker.”
Joker:”Joker? Didn’t you hear? The Clown Prince of Crime has checked out. He just couldn’t take it anymore. Couldn’t take the Batman. Always there to foil his greatest schemes, and it’s starting to drive him mad. (Batman grabs Joker) Then, the Joker thought, if he couldn’t beat the Bat, he’d be the Bat.”

The Batman: The Laughing Bat

Joker decides he’s done losing to Batman and becomes Batman. However, every Batman needs a Joker, so he uses Joker Gas in an attempt to turn Batman into the Joker. Batman manages to cure himself, but not before we see Joker attempting to be a superhero.

#8 – Joker’s Parade
Batman (1989)

Joker: “And now, folks, it’s time for “Who do you trust!” Hubba, hubba, hubba! Money, money, money! Who do you trust? Me? I’m giving away free money. And where is the Batman? He’s at home, washin’ his tights!  

– Batman (1989)

After spending most of the movie killing people with his poisonous “Smilex”, Joker invites Gotham City’s citizens to a nighttime parade where he will give away $20 million. Stupid and greedy people go to the parade where Joker throws them the money and then attacks them with Smilex. They’re only saved when Batman swoops in flying the Batwing and breaks up the parade.

#7 – Why So Serious?
The Dark Knight

Batman: “What were you trying to prove? That deep down, everyone’s as ugly as you?! You’re alone!

“The Dark Knight

For its fourth of fifth climax, The Dark Knight features Joker wiring two ships to explode, one full of people escaping Gotham City and the other filled with prisoners. He hides detonators for each ship on the other and tells the passengers to decide which one explodes. The catch? Joker will blow up both ships if they take too long.

Unfortunately for Joker, one of the prisoners throws away his ship’s detonator, the Gotham refugees decide not to blow up the prisoners, and Batman stops him from blowing up anything.

#6 – Joker’s Last Laugh
Batman: Arkham City

Batman: “Do you want to know something funny? Even after everything you’ve done, I would have saved you.”
Joker: [last words]“That actually is… pretty funny…”

 – Batman Arkham City

Slowly dying from an overdose of Titan*, Joker infects the blood supply in multiple hospitals with his own poisoned blood. He also infects Batman. With the assistance of Talia al Ghul (Ra’s daughter, voiced by Stana Katic) Batman obtains a cure and drinks part of it before debating whether he should cure Joker.

Joker attacks Batman to get the cure, inadvertently destroying it. Batman reveals he would have saved Joker, and the two old foes share a joke as Joker passes away.

#5 – Vampire Joker
Batman vs. Dracula

Joker: You’re the second Batman I’ve met tonight, and you’re both a pain in the neck.”

– The Batman vs. Dracula

It’s an average night in Gotham. The Joker’s escaped yet again and Batman is after him. But there’s a snag when Joker falls into a river while his amped-up joy-buzzer is on, seemingly electrocuting him. He survives, of course, and follows The Penguin into a graveyard.

There he meets Penguin’s new lord and master, Count Dracula, who decides to feed off of this annoying interloper. The result? A motherloving vampire Joker! Where’s Buffy when you really need her?

Batman beats Joker the Vampire and synthesizes a cure from Joker’s blood. It’s a good thing too. With vampire powers, he’d probably be unstoppable.

#4 – Emperor Joker
Batman: The Brave and The Bold

“I can’t believe it. He’s… he’s actually gone. Let’s take a moment to reflect on the passing of a man who was more than just another do-gooder in tights. He was the best arch-nemesis a sociopath could ask for. Okay, let’s do it again!”

Batman: the Brave and the Bold Emperor Joker

Joker has always been a master of manipulation, so it’s not too surprising that he could trick the reality warping Mr Mxyzptlk. But it is surprising when he tricks Mxyzptlk (voiced by Gilbert Gottfried)  into giving him God-like power. Joker used his newfound power to reshape reality to his will.

He kills Batman over and over again, defeats some of the most powerful people in the universe, and even tries destroying the universe. Superman stops Emperor Joker, but not before Joker broke Batman enough that Bats begged Superman to kill Joker.

The comic was adapted into an episode of Batman: The Brave and the Bold with a few alterations. Superman and Mxyzptlk were cut and replaced with Bat-Mite, (Paul Reubens voiced him) a Batman fanboy from the fifth dimension.

#3 – Joker Kills Metropolis
Injustice: Gods Among Us

Joker: [having just shot Jimmy Olson] “Ew. I got some Jimmy on my shoe.”

Injustice: Gods Among Us

It’s a good night for Superman. He’s just learned that Lois Lane is pregnant and is asking Batman to be the godfather while they’re working together. Meanwhile, Lois and Jimmy are investigating a story until Jimmy is killed by Joker, who then kidnaps Lois. Superman panics and calls in the entire Justice League. Joker is found in a submarine while Superman is confronted by Doomsday (Robin Atkin Downes in Batman v. Superman).

Supes drags Doomsday into space, unaware that he is also being affected by Scarecrow’s Fear Toxin. He shakes off the gas’s effects and sees that it was really Lois that he had just killed! Even worse, Joker had jury-rigged a nuke in Metropolis linked to a pacemaker he put in Lois. So when her heart stopped beating? Boom.

An enraged Superman tore his way into the Gotham City PD and shoved his arm through Joker’s chest. But Joker had the last laugh as his murder started Superman’s fall from grace.

#2 – A Death in the Family
Under the Red Hood

Joker: “The first Boy Blunder had some manners. I suppose I’m going to have to teach you a lesson so you can better follow in his footsteps. (pause) Nah, I’m just gonna keep beating you with this crowbar.”

-Batman: Under the Red Hood

While most people know the first Robin, Dick Grayson, and a lot of them know about Tim Drake, the third Robin, many forget the second. Jason Todd was a brash, violent departure from Dick Grayson, so it’s fitting that he got a brash and violent death from, you guessed it, The Joker. After finding his long-lost mother, she betrayed him to Joker, who beat the living hell out of him with a crowbar.

Joker left Jason battered and semiconscious before leaving. Jason tried escaping from the building, but saw a time bomb with only a few seconds left on the timer. Batman arrived as the building exploded and found Jason dead. Why did Robin die? The publisher polled readers, and they narrowly chose Jason’s death. 

Furious, Batman attempted to find and kill the Joker, only to learn that Joker had become an Iranian diplomat after meeting with Ayatollah Khomeini. I couldn’t make this up if I tried. The true missing moment of this story is that Commissioner Gordon never got to channel Leathal Weapon II and yell “It’s just been revoked” at Joker.

#1 – The Killing Joke
Batman: The Killing Joke

Joker: “All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That’s how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day. You had a bad day once. Am I right? I know I am. I can tell. You had a bad day, and everything changed.”

Batman: the Killing Joke

The iconic Joker story. Batman visits Joker in Arkham Asylum to see if they can iron things out. He worries that one day they’ll kill each other and wants to try and stop it before they do. Unfortunately, Joker had escaped earlier and left someone in his place.

Meanwhile, Joker plans his penultimate crime as the story flashes back to his past. He remembers being a struggling comedian with a pregnant wife who was dragged into a heist at his old workplace. As they are planning the heist, Joker’s wife and child die in an accident and Joker, who just wants out, is forced to continue.

Disguised as a villain called Red Hood, they attempt the robbery. The crooks are killed and Joker jumps into a vat of chemicals to escape Batman. The chemicals are what created Joker’s ghastly appearance.

In the present, Joker shoots Barbara Gordon, alias Batgirl, crippling her for life. He also kidnaps Commissioner Gordon, attempting to drive him insane while giving a lecture about madness and how all it takes is one bad day.

Batman arrives to stop Joker and after the battle offers him the same choice from earlier. He offers to help rehabilitate Joker. Joker considers the offer, but bitterly decides that he’s already gone way too far. Chuckling, he tells Batman the titular Killing Joke, and the two of the laugh uproariously as the story ends.

Didja get all that?

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